subtletysmyweakness:

thechocolatebrigade:

“I don’t mean to be devil’s advocate”

is usually code for “I’m about to say something that’s going to make me look like a total asshole because I genuinely don’t give a shit about your feelings, but I want to say this really bad so I’m going to say I’m playing ‘devil’s advocate’ because that’s my free pass to say what I’m about to say.”

Pretty much.

And then we can’t be friends because super ick.

or maybe it means ‘i fundamentally agree with what you are saying, but i’d like to you expand your horizons and understand other people’s points of view so let me reiterate a point of view i don’t myself believe in’

just a thought

wecansexy:

do you ever stare at someones screenname willing them to get online

taupetoupee:

unseilie:

When I was thirteen I decided that I should know what an intense electrical shock felt like, so I walked half a mile to the neighbor’s house at night and was going to touch the back of my hand to his electric fence. However, as I approached the house I saw the silhouette of him having sex with his wife through the kitchen window and I ran away.

I was not expecting that plot twist.

annawintour:

ancient greek god logic: my son is ugly i’m going to throw him off a mountain